messed up

life is pretty mess up for me now.

I am trying to figure out how much damage is done here, and sometimes you know, you can't measure it. Because that once in awhile, when you look back, those wounds are still hurting like raw skin.

And sometimes the only way to ignore the pain is to push myself through it until i finally give way and break down.

And that's where i am now......

and i don't know what to do anymore.